Friday, November 28, 2008

Just a follow-up

So, I looked up some info on the BC pills and their side effects. I found this blog with people who had been taking it, and everything I went through with this pill had happened to a LOT of other women! Everything, and it explains so much of what I went through tonight. Now, I know to read up the next time anyone prescribes me something! I cannot believe I didn't do it before I took it because then I wouldn't have taken it to begin with!

Scary night

It's 3:30 in the morning. I'm wide away, although I'm completely exhausted. I couldn't wait to get home tonight and go to sleep because it's honestly been a really long week. And, even though we had a pretty low-key Thanksgiving day, which is something that we normally do not have, it just seemed like it was SO long and took a lot of energy!

So, tonight we came home, Parker was already asleep by the time we got out of Scott's parent's street. We got him to bed, I fed Beckett and while I was feeding him I started feeling really bad. Which, over the past two weeks is nothing unusual for me. I have been feeling not so well over the past couple of weeks and have not had any clue why. I just kinda figured that my stomach had been torn up for any given reason, sometimes that happens to people. And, with Parker getting sick last week I kinda assumed that it's probably what I've been dealing with. Monday and Tuesday I felt horrible all day and then yesterday I started feeling better. Then last night after our party I started feeling bad again, but went to bed and woke up and felt fine. All throughout the day I've felt awful off and on, which on Thanksgiving, the biggest "eat all you can" day of the year (which is why it is my 2nd favorite holiday of the year!) it's not good to have no appetite. But, like it has been for the past two weeks, it's been off and on, so I would feel bad and then feel good and then feel bad again. We went to bed and I was feeling REALLY bad, like I was going to get sick at any moment and I was almost asleep when I had this really weird wave of something come over me that made me wake up instantly. I don't even really know how to explain it, but it was the strangest feeling I've ever had. So, I kinda sat up and let it pass and then tried to lay back down again. A couple of minutes later it happened again and I felt like I was going to get sick so I went into the bathroom. It felt worse than it did the first time and I felt really light-headed and dizzy and it REALLY scared me. I'm one of those people who think the worst about everything, so instantly my mind goes to, "OMG, something is wrong with me, I'm going to die" I woke Scott up because I thought, if I pass out in the bathroom I don't want him to not know and for me to be laying on the bathroom floor passed out. I told him that I felt really weird and that it was scaring me because I felt so bad and so "odd". Odd is really the only way that I can explain it. It's just a wave of weirdness that rushed over me. I told Scott that I wanted him to come in the bathroom and sit with me because I was really scared and I thought that I was going to get sick.

And, this brings me to why I think I'm sick. I don't take birth control pills, well, I have before in the past, but I'm one of those people who is an awful medicine taker. I don't take Tylenol unless my headache is close to migraine status, when I have a cold I don't take medicine to make it better unless I feel like I'm not able to function. I'm one of those people who just thinks that everything will run it's course and that I'm not going to take medicine to make it runs it's course faster than it is supposed to because it's probably not natural. AND, with birth control, I never remember to take it. I always screw it up and it's makes more sense for me not to take it and take other "precautions". So, when I went in for my 6 week post pardum check-up, Dr. Lum wanted to put me on birth control until Scott get's "snipped". So, I thought that I would give it a go.

Last night when I was feeling so bad it occurred to me that I've been feeling like this every since I started taking my birth control pills. So, I got out the little pamphlet that comes with it explaining all of the side effects, what to do when you miss a pill and all that jazz. Well, some of the side effects are, nausea, vomiting, nervousness, dizziness, depression, and many other things. I thought, well, obviously I'm getting the whole nausea part, that has to be why I've felt so bad for the past two weeks. While I was thinking I was going to be sick Scott wanted to know where i had read this info about the birth control and I told him so here I'm, head in the toilet and here is Scott sitting on the bathtub reading about my birth control...what a pair!

So, I started to feel better, came back to bed and then started feeling that "weirdness" again. So, Scott wanted me to call Dr. Lum, my doc, the best doc in the world, so I called him and asked him if it could be the pills. He told me YES! To stop taking them and see if I started feeling better and that estrogen is known to make you sick (then why give the shit out!) and the feelings I was having was probably along the lines of an anxiety attack, which is part of the estrogen and all of the changes the pill is doing to my hormones and OBVIOUSLY this is not the fit for me. Okay, I've had an anxiety attack before, while I was pregnant with Beckett, on the way to work on I-75, which is already a death trap to begin with, and it was literally one of the scariest things that I've ever gone through. It apparently was a "pregnancy induced" anxiety attack (who knew you could have those!) and this was kinda like the feeling that I was having tonight.

I don't know why I decided to get on here and write about this, but I think it has made me feel better (plus I got myself sooo worked up before I cannot even imagine going to bed yet) but I did. I just know tonight was a scary night and I think I scared the crap out of Scott (who is now sawing logs next to me). Not how I really wanted to end my Thanksgiving night. Hopefully this crap will get out of my system soon and I start to feel better and this doesn't happen again. I was VERY scared......to the point where I went back into Parkers room, climbed in his bed, gave him another kiss and a squeeze and the same to Beckett and Scott.....just in case, because we all know that tomorrow is never a guarantee. Reminding me, on one of the most important days of all, what it is I'm truely thankful for. It was THAT kind of scary. I know that I never want to feel that again.

So, now my dramatic story is done.....it's almost 4 in the morning. I wasn't going to go shopping tomorrow morning because tonight I decided I was just too tired and there was nothing I really wanted to go out and get, but now that I'm up I think I might just go out and check some sales out..........maybe!

Happy Thanksgiving all.....hope to see you again soon.

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Two more Days...

I cannot believe that in two more days it's going to be Thanksgiving. It's insane! This year has gone so fast, I cannot even believe it. I feel like it was just yesterday that I found out that I was pregnant with Beckett and look...he's already here and almost 2 months old! And, before we know it, it's going to be Christmas (my favorite holiday of the year!) and then before we know it I'm going to be heading back to work :(.
I love the holiday season, it's the best time of the year to me. I love listening to Christmas music (although I really could do this all year long!), I love shoppng in the large crowds, I love baking, I love my Christmas tree and the lights on the house. I love it all. Scott hung the outside lights on Sunday (only because the neighbors were doing it too!), and Friday after I get back from shopping I plan on decorating all day long.



Two more days until Thanksgiving, can you believe it. 2008 is almost over with, which I'm sad to see it go. It was such a good year, but I look forward to another good year ahead of us and all the exciting things that it has in store for me and my wonderful family.

OH...and Holy Crap...I just figured out how to add pictures! I feel like the biggest moron, I cannot believe that it took me this long to figure it out! So here is a couple of cute pics of the boys
from the other day -

Thursday, November 20, 2008

So, I'm in bed with Parker

It's that time of year....the time for being sick. And, not just your average cold..stomach virus sick. The worst thing in the world in my opinion. I knew that we were due...it's been a while since I've been woken up in the middle of the night hearing Parker through the monitor and walking into his room to find him laying in puke. So, for the last week, I've just had a feeling that it was coming. And, I was right.

Tonight Scott and I were sitting in the living room, wathing the Bengals suck it up once again and said something to him about "watch Parker get sick and I'll be up all night long with him." and five minutes later I heard Parker whine through the monitor. I told Scott to go check on him and then I hear Scott, "Alisha, there is puke everywhere!" I was right....our time is right now.

I feel so bad for him when he is sick. There is nothing worse than watching your poor little baby throwing up and being so sick. I hate to be sick, more than the average person I think, and I would happily be sick for him. It's misery for him and it's misery for Scott and I to have to watch him be sick.

So, here I'am laying in his bed (this is one of the main reason's we bought him a full-sized big boy bed!) for the night because he wanted me to sleep with him tonight. Scott has Beckett duty. Hopefully I can ge a little shut eye, because Mr. Beckett decided last night to stay up from 1:00-7:30, so, I'm going on about 1 hour of sleep right now! Scott said, "I'm overwhelmed with all of this....what do we do? Parker is sick, we have Beckett, I don't know what to do." I told him to calm down, we're a team and there is one parent for each child, so take one and I'll take the other and we will get through it. This is what being a parent is all about....sometimes it's not fun and it get's a bit messy (literally). I will gladly take a couple of sick nights per year for all of the wonderful moments that we have with them.

Here is to hoping my baby get's better and the rest of us stay healthy. And, that I get more than an hour of sleep tonight!

Sunday, November 9, 2008

Sleep......whats sleep?

So, I know that with a new baby, you don't get much sleep. I've been down this road before, there has been no surprise here. And, it was one of the things about having another baby that I was dredding because I know how awful it is. But, I also knew that it passes and it does get better and eventually you get sleep.

But, what I was not expecting was for PARKER to be the one who wasn't sleeping! My wonderful little boy who took 3 hour naps during the day and still went to bed at 8:30 and slept for 10-12 hours just stopped. The day we came home with Beckett the naps stopped and for two solid weeks it took us 3 hours every night to get into bed. It's been horrible. So, we've been going without naps, and now as long as he doesn't take a nap he is fine and will go to bed. But, if he does take any kind of a nap, no matter if it is for 3 hours or five minutes he doesn't go to bed until midnight. And, no nap = a insane day and a over cranky 2 year old who wants to fall asleep on the couch at 6:00 at night and parents who have to stand him up while asleep to get him to wake up. It's horrible, I hope this is just a phase.

Oh...and a message to my new little guy Beckett....sleeping more than 2 1/2 hours at a time is allowed......mommy WILL NOT be mad if you sleep more than that!

Friday, November 7, 2008

Beckett is 1 month old!

So, yesterday Beckett turned one month old! How insane is that? I cannot believe that he is already a month old, time fly's so fast. I hate it. With Parker I was in such a daze with him for the first 6 weeks it felt like, and I really don't think I got to enjoy the whole baby stage and how wonderful it really is. I thought that it was so hard, but, now looking back I should have seen how easy it was. Now, with Parker almost being 3...I know how EASY the baby stage is. Now, I really have enjoyed it, sleep deprivation and all.

So, we went to his 1 month appointment yesterday and our baby is getting to be a big boy. At his 1 week appt he was 7lbs 7oz and 19 3/4 inches long. For his one month he was 9lbs 9oz, 22 inches! He has really grown over the past month! And, I'm starting to really be able to tell. His little cheeks are filling out and he's just looking different. Looking like his dad for sure. I guess I don't get a kid that looks like me:(

But, I'm pretty sad that time is flying by the way that it has. I remember being off with Parker and it seems like it was just yesterday.....makes me so sad because I know how fast the time does go. Depressing a little I guess. I don't want my kids to grow up, I don't want my boys to be big! I think that is every parents wish. It;s not Gods plan to keep them little forever. He has big plans for both of my babies, and although I cannot wait to see what that is...I just hope it doesn't get here too fast.

So, I know I really suck at keeping this blog up...I promise as the time goes I will be better at doing so. I still have not figured out how to post pictures...I'm working on it! Then I can get all sorts of pics up about my boys!

Well, the fall is finally here!!! I love the fall, it's m favorite time of year. The leaves are changing and on my way to my parents house is the best drive ever because it's all tree filled back roads..and it is georgeous. I hate the fact that it's getting dark at 6:00, but, oh well. It's not like that forever.

Well, gonna get out of here and get some stuff done while Parker is at school. This week was a rough one for him. Pink eye in both eyes and an ear infection..yuck! But, as always, Parker is a trooper...he get's through everything with a smile!